Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like to have had children one at a time. I wonder what I might have done differently, what might have been the same. Most of all, I worry that sometimes they might be missing out because of the logistics involved when you have twins.
One thing I think would be different if I had just one two year old is that I wouldn’t take the pushchair with me everywhere. I don’t mind the idea of a trip into town taking three times as long because your little one wants to stop and look at every crack in the pavement, every fish in the fishmonger’s. That’s part of the wonder of being two. I’d like to be able to take them to feed the ducks and let them get close to the water to watch for fish, to see the ducks coming to gobble up the bread they have thrown for them. But I don’t get to let my two year olds do those things, at least not when I’m on my own (which is most of the time). At the moment containment, and therefore safety, takes precedence over letting them explore – much to my disappointment.
Yesterday we went for a trip into town. We needed to get some fish, so I lugged my weighty but fabulous Jane powertwin, complete with 4 stones-worth of toddlers, up the step and through the chain curtain into the shop. Today, I have sore bum muscles to show for it. Little Man and Little Miss were stuck in the pushchair having to be content with peering at the fishmonger’s wares over the plastic window in front of them. We went to a little cafe for coffee (for me) and crumpets (definitely for them, especially when they came dripping with butter). It’s a cafe we go to quite a lot and they are always helpful and accommodating, even with a six foot long pushchair. Of course it didn’t stop one of the other customers muttering a comment about there not being enough room for ‘that thing’. Well I’m sorry, but I have just as much right to be here as you (and maybe more – perhaps she should try a morning out with toddler twins without a cup of coffee?)
I don’t like that I still have to use the pushchair all the time, but it makes life manageable. When we went to the park last week I knew the only way I was ever going to get them back to the car afterwards was to offer them a Goodies oaty bar in the pushchair. It works a treat, and stops me from being in one of those ‘herding cats’ situations, with all the other mums watching me, aghast.
I’m looking forward to the days when I don’t have to go everywhere with a pushchair in front of me – but for now, it’s staying!
I feel sad for my twins. When my eldest was two she walked everywhere. She’s a brilliant walker now. It’s just not possible with the twins. It is getting better now. I make them walk home from the school run or let one walk there and it is possible – but very very hard. Only six months and they have to walk to school as I’m not taking them in the pram then. That’s a bit daunting!
Rebecca English recently posted..The Cat in the Hat Craft
Yes, imagine the comments you’d get walking home with a childless double buggy… My two love to walk and will walk a long way when given the chance – I’m just hoping they’re getting enough opportunities to continue to love it, and not becoming too used to relaxing in the pushchair!
I can completely empathise with you. I have 14 month old toddling triplets and I would love to let them loose to explore and just “pop” into a shop so they can press their faces up against the glass whilst choosing a treat! I am quite laid back and love letting them run around in a closed safe space, but like you said you have to work within what is physically possible.
It won’t be long though and then they will get to experience the world just like any other child :-)
Yes, with triplets I think you’d need eyes in locations other than just the back of your head! I think once they reach about 3 and become a little more compliant, things might become more feasible… I hope…
Thank u for this post. I often read your blog in awe of the things u get done with your 2 but its comforting to know its not just me who feels bad we are constrained by the extra logistics and that they have less freedom than a singleton. And yes, I know about herding cats – someone suggested a sheepdog while we were out once!
That was helpful of them! The things people say… Don’t be in awe – I only show you a snapshot of our days, you don’t really get to see the bad bits! ;) No really, I generally find it totally exhausting being a full time mummy, however much I love it!
I’ve been reading your blog a little while now and am in awe of the things you manage to do with your twins! I do have 3 children so it can get quite busy, but I did have them one at a time and even when I only had the one I don’t think I did half the things you do! No way are your children missing out.
You have great ideas on your blog.
Thank you, that’s so lovely to hear!