Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like to have had children one at a time. I wonder what I might have done differently, what might have been the same. Most of all, I worry that sometimes they might be missing out because of the logistics involved when you have twins.
One thing I think would be different if I had just one two year old is that I wouldn’t take the pushchair with me everywhere. I don’t mind the idea of a trip into town taking three times as long because your little one wants to stop and look at every crack in the pavement, every fish in the fishmonger’s. That’s part of the wonder of being two. I’d like to be able to take them to feed the ducks and let them get close to the water to watch for fish, to see the ducks coming to gobble up the bread they have thrown for them. But I don’t get to let my two year olds do those things, at least not when I’m on my own (which is most of the time). At the moment containment, and therefore safety, takes precedence over letting them explore – much to my disappointment.
Yesterday we went for a trip into town. We needed to get some fish, so I lugged my weighty but fabulous Jane powertwin, complete with 4 stones-worth of toddlers, up the step and through the chain curtain into the shop. Today, I have sore bum muscles to show for it. Little Man and Little Miss were stuck in the pushchair having to be content with peering at the fishmonger’s wares over the plastic window in front of them. We went to a little cafe for coffee (for me) and crumpets (definitely for them, especially when they came dripping with butter). It’s a cafe we go to quite a lot and they are always helpful and accommodating, even with a six foot long pushchair. Of course it didn’t stop one of the other customers muttering a comment about there not being enough room for ‘that thing’. Well I’m sorry, but I have just as much right to be here as you (and maybe more – perhaps she should try a morning out with toddler twins without a cup of coffee?)
I don’t like that I still have to use the pushchair all the time, but it makes life manageable. When we went to the park last week I knew the only way I was ever going to get them back to the car afterwards was to offer them a Goodies oaty bar in the pushchair. It works a treat, and stops me from being in one of those ‘herding cats’ situations, with all the other mums watching me, aghast.
I’m looking forward to the days when I don’t have to go everywhere with a pushchair in front of me – but for now, it’s staying!